So as I was busy planning and sorting things out for my upcoming birthday dinner this Saturday, a thought struck me, "Last year at this time, was I this busy or things were already in place for my birthday dinner party?"
The answer is the former. This time around last year, I was still busy making plans and inviting people over to my party. I was still having headaches on selecting the best venue, date, menu etc. It was so poorly planned and I remember making a promise to myself, "Next year I will do it better."
Turns out, I'm not. I'm not doing it any better than last year. I'm still the sloppy, poor-planner as I was last year. Perhaps I can take comfort with the fact that I got a little busier this year with #twtupJohor and other stuff, but in a nutshell, I didn't fulfil my own promise I made to myself, last year.
And that triggered me to think at a larger scale. Looking at a bigger picture. My life as a whole. Have I changed for the better this year? Am I a better person than who I was last year? Am I keeping the promises I've made before?
Plenty of yes and no I'd might say. Then I started to evaluate myself, where I am and who am I now. I started to look around. I started to compare. I started to analyse.
How do I fare, work wise? Am I a better employee now? Do I understand things that I didn't last year? Can I solve problems that I can't back then? What about financial-wise? Have I started saving for my future? Or am I still a big spender like I've always been?
And one can't simply run from the relationship question. I remember seeing a girl, at this time last year, which didn't turn out well. Fast forward to one year later, she already has a boyfriend now with 3 different ex-boyfriends before that. And me? I'm still roaming free in this lonely town called the singlehood. Well no change there.
So the questions keep on flowing, like I'm doing an interview and a post-mortem on myself. Have I gained more weight this year (yes), do I drive a better car this year (no), do I have more Twitter followers this year (yes) and the list goes on and on.
So, the bottom line is, people say life is a journey. Up ahead, looking forward. But there's certainly no harm in looking back once in awhile. Not to dwell on our past, but to do a reality check on ourself. To evaluate things. To analyse situations. To re-set goals. To see where do we stand today.
Those evaluating is not enough. We must strive to be better. We need to adjust our attitude if it needs to be. We have to grow up, and be more wiser than we were last year.
So tell me, exactly one year ago, what were you doing? And are you generally doing it better this year?
